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Once I realized I had been making things more complicated for myself, I noticed a similar relationship with more things in my life, cooking, exercise, and even this blog. For so long, my mindset was, “I like this thing, and I want to do it, so I have to do it.” I made the things I wanted to enjoy chores. I overly complicated them to the point of robbing them of joy.
It is utterly clear to me that I do NOT have my shit together. Though many people tell me I do, I assure you, I do not. It isn’t even close to together. My shit is so not together that a backpack or a carry-on wouldn’t be sufficient to get it together. I would need one of those POD moving things for my shit at this point.
I wasn’t weighed down by my excessive amount of bags, it was the feeling of failure and the fear of it. Why though? Because I missed one run? Because I hadn’t finished this post? Because I took longer to learn a new process this week than I wanted to? I talked myself into my own fresh hell. The idea that we create this hell for ourselves by agreeing to it and that we can change our state by forming new agreements is the premise of Dong Miguel Ruiz’ The Four Agreements.
I built a career around managing and maintaining relationships, it’s what I do best. In sales, client management, project management, being able to building productive relationships is the key to success. When people know you care about them and will go to bat for them, they’re more willing to help you out when you need it. I’m good at relationships, except...maybe...I’m not.